Week at Wong Engineering

It was fun time to learn and spend time with 4 Japanese guys.

Charismatic as it may be, he is also born in the year of tiger same as me.

Drinking last night was not bad.

The round table was too big.

We exchange some shyness in our eye contact.

I guess there isn't much love.

He is the man who will grow Malaysia office rapidly.

But too bad, I might resign.

His incapable GM to see a good remuneration package could grow the company.

An investment worth to put off.

It's below market value.

Don't they know or understand the salary of a position of this standard?

I'm worry I'll shock everyone.

I'm worry I'll disappoint everyone.

I'm worry I'll get bad karma.

I'm worry I might take people for granted.

No doubt the capability of me growing this company is there.

But there's no drive in it.

Betrayal, below market value is all that's hurting.

Why is this big MNC company, with workers having to make ends meet in their finance?

Profitable for sure.

Worker eat cheap food to survive.

Why is that so?

Working with a first class company.

Surviving third class income.

It's all politics.

Incapable leader is letting things to happen and not changing.

What do I want?!

Salary satisfaction?

Comfort zone?

Working environment?

Family like environment?

Loving caring environment?

Challenging environment?

Easy life environment?

Father like manager?

High standard manager?

Or a manager that will smile at me caused I've learned my lesson?

Am I ready to leave my beautiful life?

Will I like myself to step into a hazardous life?

If I were to leave, this is just like a break up to me.

My lovely friends, so lovely friends, so chilling up friends, so fun comfortable friends, so humorous friends, so kindly friends, so laughable friends, so sweet and dear friends... Am I ready to leave them for something out there? I love them so much, but can I be with them longer or will I able to leave?

Oh oh, what do I want Tan Su Ding?

I can't even figure out what type of man I want to land myself into.

Sometimes I like mature & strong hard guy, but sometimes I like soft lovely childish guy.

Things that I want or like is all completely opposite to one another.

Sigh. Why I can be so confused? Has I lost the will power to choose; to really want something anymore? I used to know very clearly what I want. What path I wanted to travel. I was once too dried out on my journey in getting what I want. Might be, the exhaustion is still dancing in my bone.

Do I like easily? Do I love easily?

One note: Why he didn't pick up my phone? Probably he needs to think about me and not ready to see me. Alright, I will take this answer to myself. Sigh.

Sleepless Again

Oh oh... can't sleep due to emotional rush, due to the supplement mum gave me.

Throat is not feeling well.

Well well. I think I love him. Don't think of anything and enjoy the process. Step by step oh.

Perhaps It's Time for Change

I can't be here for long.

For I was forced to embrace it.

The first step to this place is broken.

There's no meaning left to stay.

I will be here till my luck gets better.

For I'm still lazy to move out.
Time will slowly unfold opportunity.

I will go out and fight in new battle.

Things maybe a lot different.

I will meet different people.

I will grow way better.

Wiser leader in me will unfold.

I sometimes wonder.

Why this world is this way.

Stronger will I be.

Better will I become.

Different leadership.

Different values.

All I need is.

The power inside me.

To FIGHT for a new chapter.

From the interview.

I was acknowledged.

Good. Strong. Over Confident.

Yes I may.

For the best or the worst.

I take the risk.

Of doing the best.

For this demanding soul.

Torn Apart

I'm attracted to both men.

Both won my heart in every way.

Now I'm going to distance myself away from them.

No more seeing each other so often.

No more complicating my heart.

I can't do my work properly.

All I see and think is them.

I can't sail in two ship at one time. this is fact.

Working Now

Yah. I am waiting for the backup to be restored into SDD.


I've had the time of my life

And I've never felt this way before

And I swear this is true

And I owe it all to you

I've had the time of my life

Well well, I have to admit that all this good joyous truest beautiful moments with friends, family and colleagues is happening right now for quite sometimes, and it smells forever.

3 men into me. The poorest man stands the boldest in my heart and the richest man stands the thinnest in my heart. Who says money matters most? I'm living it my way. Rich doesn't mean much to me. It's the compatibility, personality, characters and giving, providing ability that counts. Money don't sound when it comes to choosing a partner.

I'm not too sure which one I'll get along with in the end. Too good to be true. I'm glowing glowing glowing.

I don't care what's going on next, I'm thinking hard about perseverance of emotions and balance as such.

I want it all want it all want it all.

Love------

What may come has come,
What shouldn't come has come.

Sigh, sometimes I hate my honesty to tell what's behind. But I am not strong to keep everything to myself. Will this honesty bring damages in between?

Sister is safe. But not mum! She tells dad everything. Obviously dad shouldn't know things which is raw. He should only tastes the delicious cooked up food.

Now that I'm half doomed. Sending my own misery to others. I think I may have get others into complicated thinking.