Christmas Eve

It is Christmas and I feel like going to beach. Spend some sweet time there. It's beautiful in my imagination, but I just wonder if it would be beautiful in reality.

With beer, mat, snacks, ice cream, cake, just sitting or laying under the sky with shining stars on the eve of Christmas, would it be significant allowing dense and lively emotions. With some space for romance. Oh my, feels like escaping to somewhere and enjoy sunset right away. Oh my, life is about making money and enjoy all these feelings!!

Sigh. Sometimes things happen again. I guess I had not guard thing from happening. Carelessly let it flow again. Sometimes, being silent and quiet is just perfect. After many years of being noisy, isn't it time for me to be quiet?? Okei. 2011 is coming real soon. So I gotta review my 2010 resolution and see from there if I had achieve them all.

Every passing day, I feel different about myself. Feels like I am growing older and not wiser at the moment. I gotta start preparing my room into a proper piece of heaven, and start laying out what are the things I would definitely need to do. I am not strong in my direction yet. This is not going to stay on forever.

I have to start something seriously. These are the things I always had on my mind when I was in uni. These are the things I told myself many times that I would start building. And I need to before I lost too much of time!!!!!!

crazy working day

It's crazy because I sleep at 2.30am, after long hours of gaming!!! I love the game so much, because it makes my mind to think nothing but only the game. Loving it to maximum.

I was almost winning. Getting tired. Defeat the blue team, and then yellow team was rather weak as well. So I just simply arrange my team without reassurance with the thought I would definitely win with my stronger units all over. But I was wrong. Without proper strategy, I am losing my rockets and battleship one by one. Slowly my team become weaker.

Almost certain, that things you appreciate most can be lost easily. Instead, things you least appreciate will more likely stay with you. I had experience this many times.

Friends BBQ birthday party

Laughed much. The BBQ was simply good. Was mixing with this group of born rich guy. Family business has made them enjoying life with loads of money. Too pampered, too secured with money.

Know what, this group of people smoke heavily, drink heavily, and will get gf to have fun with or to cure their loneliness. I felt I am way way different from them. But it was fun to mix with, especially their words can be powerful that you will laughed so happily! Or maybe it's from the liquor?!

I am now, one phone call and will make it to meet you. So flexible. It was nice, nobody to stop me from going out as much as I want. Even if Sim is around, he wouldn't stop me as well. I don't know if we will slowly grow apart, or the distance gonna make our love fonder. I don't know. We don't hang hours on the phone, I sometimes don't know what we are. Sounds complicated right. I really don't know. Life is like a maze. Every steps will lead to somewhere. In the end, you gotta know your goal, want, and need right.

First Day

What I am going to face in this career path is still uncertain and all. But I get a few things from here, which sound promising. Salary wise, satisfied. Job scope wise, satisfied. Environment wise, acceptable.

Thinking back, if I should scold myself stupid or what. The offer I had got from Rotina group is actually much appealing than what I am having here right now. The one the old man offered me pays better than here in the long run. One main point I didn't accept it because of its based at KL. Or I would be so excited on preparing myself to Canada for 3weeks. Ou. How could I miss out on that. Sigh. It sounded like he would offer me a manager position if I do it nicely for him. A very profitable company with a handful of opportunities to rise. I rejected it, cause it was at KL. Simple and simple. I just want Penang or Singapore. Sigh...... If only I would be able to learn to accept KL life, I would be able to travel few times per month to Indonesia, Singapore, Korea and many more because he wants to travel less and let us younger generation to take care of his business with his supervision.

There's no use regretting, but still I want to feel it. This make me humour. Wished I would be send somewhere out of SEA for training. How wonderful could this be... The exotic feeling I can imagine.

Dooosh

When I see my phone ring, I was thinking yah good you called to update me. Then she told me there are two important news to break to you. Both of them are not really a good news after all. Trip down south deferred. Double sob. Just look at the bright side would make things easier.

Ting coming to Penang this weekend. So going to ready some energy to have really lots of fun with her. Not meeting her for quite some time already, about one month? Is that long? Normal.

Went out with Lin today. Just somehow wish her to be staying at Chai Leng Park whenever I stay at Inderawasih. Somebody really nice to hang out with. Easy going, and yah some kind of chemistry, having some same level of frequency. Hard to find a friend so warm to be with. She's leaving soon. huhu

Frank Mc Court

Oh oh... "McCourt died at a Manhattan hospice after a short battle with skin cancer. The author announced in May that he was undergoing chemotherapy for melanoma."

He was a talented writer, I love his writing to max!! He share with us, bringing back what was there in the early 18th century. How things was in details manner. His essays sound slow and smooth. And I wonder how he would remember all the things when he was just only 4 years old. Perhaps his childhood had give him too much significant suffering that the memory sticks on his mind.

Drowned into the past at America, his father was a horrible drinker and smoker. I wonder how could a man can be so stupid, so ignorance of his own family hunger for his own addiction towards smoke and alcohol. People who failed to move out of their addiction are weak and losers. Double salute and appreciate how my father would remove cigarettes smoke from his lung for his beloved family.

Fedex or Amada

I am being invited for interview from Fedex, I am still in the midst of dense thinking should I grab this or not......... I already had an offer at Japanese company.

I definitely love US company very much more than Japanese company. I would definitely be extremely excited like how I did at Singapore.

But, my excitement at working as a business development executive had got me with a great disappointment. My highest energy to work out the best ends up a disaster. For now, my energy to work in sales/business development hardly grows.

Would my mental power be strong enough to grab the job? I am still trying hard to gather all my internal energy if I would be able to bring out the best in me. I am still thinking if Fedex is all that I want.

Would I be able to have this strong believe on Fedex like how I did for Girl Guide Association?

arghhh what to decide??? consulting engineer versus sales executive at Fedex?!