Perhaps It's Time for Change

I can't be here for long.

For I was forced to embrace it.

The first step to this place is broken.

There's no meaning left to stay.

I will be here till my luck gets better.

For I'm still lazy to move out.
Time will slowly unfold opportunity.

I will go out and fight in new battle.

Things maybe a lot different.

I will meet different people.

I will grow way better.

Wiser leader in me will unfold.

I sometimes wonder.

Why this world is this way.

Stronger will I be.

Better will I become.

Different leadership.

Different values.

All I need is.

The power inside me.

To FIGHT for a new chapter.

From the interview.

I was acknowledged.

Good. Strong. Over Confident.

Yes I may.

For the best or the worst.

I take the risk.

Of doing the best.

For this demanding soul.

Torn Apart

I'm attracted to both men.

Both won my heart in every way.

Now I'm going to distance myself away from them.

No more seeing each other so often.

No more complicating my heart.

I can't do my work properly.

All I see and think is them.

I can't sail in two ship at one time. this is fact.

Working Now

Yah. I am waiting for the backup to be restored into SDD.


I've had the time of my life

And I've never felt this way before

And I swear this is true

And I owe it all to you

I've had the time of my life

Well well, I have to admit that all this good joyous truest beautiful moments with friends, family and colleagues is happening right now for quite sometimes, and it smells forever.

3 men into me. The poorest man stands the boldest in my heart and the richest man stands the thinnest in my heart. Who says money matters most? I'm living it my way. Rich doesn't mean much to me. It's the compatibility, personality, characters and giving, providing ability that counts. Money don't sound when it comes to choosing a partner.

I'm not too sure which one I'll get along with in the end. Too good to be true. I'm glowing glowing glowing.

I don't care what's going on next, I'm thinking hard about perseverance of emotions and balance as such.

I want it all want it all want it all.

Love------

What may come has come,
What shouldn't come has come.

Sigh, sometimes I hate my honesty to tell what's behind. But I am not strong to keep everything to myself. Will this honesty bring damages in between?

Sister is safe. But not mum! She tells dad everything. Obviously dad shouldn't know things which is raw. He should only tastes the delicious cooked up food.

Now that I'm half doomed. Sending my own misery to others. I think I may have get others into complicated thinking.

Congratulations

I feel proud with what he had achieved so far. Proudly, this had always been want I wanted to create in his life. Now he had more than he expected in his career life and don't want me in his life anymore, and that marks the end of our 4years relationship. We are now officially off.

He called and ask how should he share his love and happiness with me when we are so far apart in distance. Well, I told him perhaps this is our fate and destiny. Find happiness at your own.

Feeling proud and great for helping this man who is in depression, very pessimistic, and heavily negative in his thinking. And now, I had successfully transform him into someone optimistic, strongly believe in his own dream, and way much positive thinking than he is before. Though this relationship has to stop right here, I feel all this years is not a waste but something that happened, something very meaningful in my life for I had done something great in his life.

I feel really good looking back at the change he had. From someone in horribly deep shit, emotionally critical into someone respected with loads of money for him. He work really hard, and with little smart. Now, I'm directing and inspiring him to work smart and leave work hard slowly. The result will be tremendously amazing.

Again, I feel good for the achievement he'd got. For this is what I intend to create, and now I see the result. Hoooooooorayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Blue Day

Very very very very very very sad!!!!!!!!!
Pendrive lost! I like this pendrive so much because it was provided by the company and now it is lost!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wuuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuuuuuwwuuuuuwuwuwuwuwu.........

Am I Scary?

I'm down down down down.

I think my manager can be shocked and afraid of me when I suddenly doing things that didn't have sign on my face.

Keep telling myself, reduce outing, reduce dinner outside, but I still failed to reject the dinner invited to celebrate H's birthday.

I needed! not want! Yes I needed more time at home clearing and cleaning what should.

I don't know where I am heading in my life. I take advise from my manager seriously. Build strong foundation, don't involve in politics. Talking about my manager... A lot said that he is like my father. In terms of his age and my age, he appears like my father. We speak hokkien and sense some gap due to the age gap.

Sometimes, I do disagree with what he said but yet I have to agree with respect. No doubt I respect him a lot. Respecting doesn't have to agree and follow his way/style completely. Sometimes I disagree but I still respect. When he pushes me doing things which I felt is wrong, I higher my tone when speaking to him clarifying how wrong it is and look away.

Sometimes, I feel he is afraid of me. When I create chaos that is beyond his imagination and prediction.

I do not know why, I am acting such a way. Is that just me? Who am I? Can I like-respect-support-love-enjoy-follow all the way to the end in a work relationship without any horrible feeling on both party?

Sometimes, I feel like I am betraying people around me for my uncontrollable action. Will they feel that I'm scary?

When I am in silent mode, it means I am arranging my strategy. I put my strategy into action immediately when the confident of winning touches the green level.





Sang happy birthday song to Hafiz today. He is same age as me. Yah, he is one of the most rational man in the office. Of cz Chia and Hafiz are equally rational. I like the idea of being rational.

After 1year of leaving uni, I learnt that a good leader-management must not make decision based on emotions-politics-gossip-relationship. This will only make your work even harder, add working pressure, worst of all, is when your co-worker look down at you with their pair of eye. One sour fact is that, many decides based on relationship! High importance for a sales person to build good relations and gives high attention to their customers.

I'm sorry to most people who see my sour face for many days at office.